Blank and Fractured

Earlier today, I wandered from the computer to the kitchen, from the television to the bedroom, fluttering between them, but I couldn't manage to settle into one place or one activity.

I opened Word to write...post something, and the blank screen made fun of me, taunting me like a French stereotype. Then, I found myself publishing a Blank post..a post without one single word or even letter.

A few days ago I accidentally erased most of my hard drive (all my documents, photos and music files ) G.O.N.E. Instead of stressing, I sighed with relief...less data makes me feel better. Today, I wished I could do the same with a certain portion of my brain, the area that has been debating for days and can't handle it anymore. I wish to simply delete an entire segment of brain activity, because I am exhausted from all the whole banking idea.

My hair is a mess, my skin feels too tight and at the tips of my fingers and toes.

I want a bubblebath, but I don't want to commit to the necessary time for a good soak. I want to read, but nothing interests me.

I'm not hungry,but I'm craving...Something..something I can't name . I'm not sure if it's a flavor, a texture, a scent, a sound, an image or a combination of some or all.

I feel blank, like a clean paper, but with none of the associated possibilities.

I feel fractured, like a reflection from a broken mirror.

I want. I need.

I don't know.